Unattractive Clients
FAQ: “What if you don’t find me attractive?”
One of the most common concerns people share before meeting me is this:
“What if you don’t find me attractive?”
Sometimes the question comes out directly. Other times it appears indirectly through nervous messages about age, body type, or appearance.
The short answer is simple.
Your physical appearance is not what determines whether we will have a good experience together.
Attraction works differently for me
I fall somewhere on the demisexual spectrum, which means I rarely feel physical attraction to strangers.
For me, attraction grows from connection. Intellectual curiosity, emotional presence, humour, and the way someone treats me all play a much bigger role than how they look.
Because of this, physical appearance isn’t the deciding factor in whether I enjoy time with someone.
What matters far more is the energy someone brings into the room.
Are you respectful?
Are you curious?
Are you present?
Those things are far more attractive than abs.
What actually makes someone attractive to me
The way you communicate and the way you treat me matter far more than your appearance.
When someone takes the time to write a thoughtful enquiry, reads my website, understands my boundaries, and communicates clearly, I immediately feel more excited to meet them.
It signals respect. It signals emotional intelligence. It tells me the experience will likely be enjoyable for both of us.
In contrast, the things that quickly kill attraction are behaviours like:
• negotiating rates
• ignoring clearly stated boundaries
• not reading my website
• sending vague or demanding messages
Experience has shown me that how someone communicates before we meet often reflects how they will behave in the room.
A respectful, thoughtful enquiry is genuinely very appealing.
What I truly don’t care about
People often worry about their:
- weight
- height
- age (18+ of course)
- body hair
- injuries or disabilities
- gender identity
- race or cultural background
None of those things determine whether we will connect.
Human attraction is far more varied than the narrow beauty standards promoted by media.
If you have been measuring yourself against those standards, you may find it liberating to realise they simply don’t apply here.
FAQ: “Will you feel embarrassed being seen with me in public?”
Another concern people sometimes share is whether I will feel uncomfortable being seen with them in public.
For some people this comes from years of being made to feel self-conscious about their appearance. Others worry that I might prefer to keep meetings strictly private and would rather not be seen together outside.
The truth is that I’m very comfortable sharing time with lovers out in the world.
Many of my favourite experiences include dinner dates, gallery visits, theatre shows, exploring nature, or simply wandering through the city together before returning somewhere more private.
Extended time together often naturally includes these kinds of shared moments. Overnight and longer bookings allow us to step outside the feeling of a scheduled meeting and move through different environments together, whether that’s a beautiful dinner out, a walk through a market, or a quiet morning coffee somewhere new.
The same applies when we travel. For lovers who enjoy travel companionship or Fly Me To You bookings, part of the joy is discovering places together and sharing experiences beyond the bedroom.
Many people tell me afterwards how nice it felt that I was genuinely relaxed being seen with them in public. There is something surprisingly powerful about sharing ordinary moments together without any sense of embarrassment or secrecy.
Connection doesn’t only happen behind closed doors.
The only real turn-offs
There are only a few things that genuinely make a meeting uncomfortable:
Poor hygiene, bad breath, or disrespectful attitudes.
The first two are easily solved. I provide shower facilities and mouthwash so everyone can feel fresh and relaxed.
The third comes down to mindset. Respect, kindness, and openness go a long way.
Conversation is the real aphrodisiac
Interestingly, the moments when I have felt genuine attraction toward lovers have rarely been about appearance.
It usually happens when we are animatedly talking about something we both care about.
Curiosity and conversation are incredibly attractive to me.
But if conversation runs dry, I also happen to enjoy nipple play.
A note about attraction in general
I don’t personally subscribe to conventional beauty standards.
The media tends to promote a very narrow definition of attractiveness, but real life is far more expansive.
People are drawn to all sorts of different qualities in each other.
For me, intelligence, humour, kindness, and curiosity are far more compelling than appearance alone.
A slightly unusual example
For context, even when it comes to celebrities I don’t really experience attraction in the typical way.
People often talk about how “hot” a particular actor is, but that doesn’t resonate for me unless I feel some kind of connection to the character they play.
Some fictional characters have definitely sparked that kind of attraction for me though.
A few favourites include:
• Tilda Swinton as Orlando
• Vincent D’Onofrio as Detective Goren
• William Petersen as Gil Grissom
• Emma Stone as Bella Baxter
• Patrick Stewart as Jean-Luc Picard
• Brent Spiner as Data
• Michelle Yeoh (in almost everything)
For me, attraction is almost always tied to character, intelligence, and personality.
The real takeaway
If you’re worried about whether I will find you attractive, the answer is simpler than you might think.
Treat me well. Communicate thoughtfully. Consider my needs. Show curiosity and respect.
Those things are infinitely more appealing than how you look.
How we can spend time together
If you’re feeling curious about meeting but still a little unsure of what the experience might look like, there are many different ways we can spend time together.
Some lovers enjoy a relaxed Girlfriend Experience, where conversation, connection and sensual intimacy unfold naturally. Others come to explore curiosity around kink, power dynamics, or playful fantasies in a safe and welcoming space.
We might share a dinner date, spend an unhurried afternoon together, or settle into the deeper rhythm of overnight and extended experiences where we have time to truly relax into each other’s company.
For those imagining something even more immersive, I also offer travel companionship and Fly Me To You bookings, allowing us to meet somewhere beautiful or spend several days exploring a new destination together.
Every meeting is a little different. Some are light and playful, others are deeply sensual or exploratory. The common thread is presence, curiosity, and mutual enjoyment.
If you’d like to learn more about the experiences I offer, you can explore my menu.
When you’re ready to reach out, simply send me a message with a little about yourself, your preferred dates, and what kind of experience you’re imagining.
